Friday, May 06, 2005

Jacob and Esau revisited

This past weekend I had the pleasure of being the best man at my younger brother's wedding. He asked me an interesting question driving to the wedding site ( We had been talking about how he was feeling and his thoughts on this important day and then he surprised me by asking how _I_ was feeling about this all. Our situations are somewhat similar- both of our relationships started August 2002. We've both been through ups and downs. We've both taken major trips (albeit his was to Philly and we went to Cebu but I digress). Both of us intend to spend a lifetime with the person we've found. The only difference is that his marriage will be recognized universally and mine will not.

One of the major reasons my boyfriend and I are moving to Canada is because they value diversity in word AND deed. Being from another race, religion or sexual orientation is not a barrier in Canada but a great advantage. To this end, Canada is on the cusp of joining the countries of Netherlands and Belgium in recognizing same sex marriage ( Other countries of Denmark, France, Iceland, Norway and Sweden -- offer similar legal status to civil unions. Poland, Romania, South Africa, Spain, Israel and New Zealand also are close to approval of marriage equality. While it is disappointing that the "Land of the Free and Home of the Brave" is neither, it's not surprising, given how slow it was to abolish Biblically-defended slavery and racial discrimination, not to mention offering women's suffrage. Neither am I surprised that my homestate of Kansas just redundantly voted in a constitutional discriminatory ammendment. (Go here for a story of a brave soul from Atwood, KS who finally had enough!

What saddens me the most however is much like the dilema of Esau and Jacob. Jacob took the birthright and also the blessing of his father and yet he was the younger, not the older brother. Now although I don't begrudge my younger brother any of his well-deserved happiness, the parallels still remain. The heritage (birthright) will pass through him, not me. My father (minister in the American Baptist churches) is allowed to bless his wedding, not mine. I have to be honest and admit that I'm a little envious. My boyfriend and I both very much want a wedding where we commit to each other in front of our family, friends and more importantly, God. And we will have that someday. Thanks to the good folks in Canada, the government will also treat us the same as everyone else. Now if everyone could be Christ-like in their demeanor, what a wonderful world it would be!


David said...

hey this is Dave's assistant, Santi. check out my blog, and let me know what you think:

It has some links that may be of interest to you

Jolie said...

Wow, oh wow, this truly made me very sad. You are such a strong person!